The “grind” mindset adopted by most students can blind them from seeing what’s really important: balance.
“Striving is great, setting goals and working hard to achieve those goals is great. But I think there’s a point at which it can cross over into something that’s a little bit more unproductive or unhelpful and at worst, harmful or toxic. And that’s when it comes at a cost to how you feel about yourself,” psychologist Natalie Dattilo said.
Pressure from family, school and society makes it difficult for students to learn how to find a balance between productivity and rest. The emphasis put on appearing productive has instilled a fear of being viewed as “lazy,” according to Dr. Dattilo. This type of toxic thinking leads to burnout.
“Students can feel the pressure of not wanting to disappoint their parents or do anything that can ruin their chances for college, especially because we think about the future a lot,” senior Lena Meri said.
Meri has taken six AP classes in high school, is taking three more this year and is also a part of two clubs. This class load is considered normal for most high school students and is heavily encouraged by the school, according to senior Helen Kangus.
“It’s good for students to be well rounded but that is a crazy work ethic and then on top of that you have to be social and you have to get sleep. This is all important for your mental health as a developing teenager and what? If you don’t do all of that you won’t get into college and you’re a failure?” senior Helen Kangus said.
Social media also contributes to this pressure, according to Dr. Dattilo. There’s an overwhelming number of vlogs, routines, trends or aesthetics that set examples of how students’ days should look, allowing little time for rest and encouraging the “go, go, go” mindset. Because social media also acts as a highlight reel for most users, senior Marcella Najar points out that these standards and trends seen online are often unrealistic as well.
“There’s a lot of comparisons being made. There’s this idea that we can always be doing more or better, and that’s a problem that makes us feel like we’re not enough, that makes us feel like we’re not doing enough, we don’t have enough, we’re not accomplished enough. And I think that can actually backfire and make us feel worse and less motivated to achieve,” Dr. Dattilo said.
Signs of anxiety and stress are popular indicators that toxic productivity is negatively impacting students’ mental health or self-image, according to Dr. Dattilo. Counselor Maura Ahlborn commonly notices a decline in grades or behavioral changes like students being distracted or less motivated when they are experiencing these mental health signs as result from burnout.
Learning about balance at a younger age can prevent these symptoms and help students set healthy habits and boundaries now, which sets them up for success later in life, according to therapist Cindy Mitchell.
“It (balance) is just important for mental health. The suicide rates across the world for teenagers are just astronomical and that is so terrible. The fact that life sucks so bad for people that haven’t even really gotten the opportunity to live life that they would just take it away, that’s terrifying. And the fact that nobody seems to care and we are just continuously pressuring students to do more and more and more,” Kangus said. “It’s like, when is it going to stop? We’re already feeling burnout, but can you imagine 15 years, if you have kids, how they are going to feel? It’s going to ramp up so much and it’s not going to be good.”
If students feel this pressure start to take a physical toll on them, they should consider what the reason behind their motivation is, according to Dr. Dattilo. And what would happen if they allowed themselves a chance to breathe.
Life is about balance. While it can look different for everyone at different points in each person’s life, balance is what people should strive for over perfection, according to Dr. Dattilo.
“Be motivated and work hard to achieve your goals but realize that there’s a lot to life. There’s a lot more to life than I think you are able to really see and experience without the perspective that you get as you keep moving through life and having new experiences,” Dr. Dattilo said. “So, enjoy, that’s a big one. Enjoy where you are right now. Don’t focus so much on the future that you forget to enjoy the now.”
